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    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing</loc>
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    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/measureofmamaslife</loc>
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    <lastmod>2026-01-07</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - How do you measure a life? My mama's legacy of love</image:title>
      <image:caption>My mama, Barbara Campos, died on winter solstice (December 21), in the beautiful and light-filled home she created with her husband, Richard. She loved fiercely, and so many benefitted from being loved by her.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - How do you measure a life? My mama's legacy of love - Several of us wrote letters to my mama to be cremated along with her body. We bundled the letters with the cloth measuring tape from her sewing kit, the packet a literal measure of our love for her.</image:title>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - How do you measure a life? My mama's legacy of love - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Barbara Campos, 1943-2025.</image:caption>
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    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/table-for-two-a-visual-poem-about-grief-amp-finding-pockets-of-joy</loc>
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    <lastmod>2025-10-30</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - "Table for Two": a visual poem about grief &amp;amp; finding pockets of joy - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>the ceiling fan whispers in my mama’s room</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/showing-up-for-aging-parents</loc>
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    <lastmod>2025-04-07</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Showing Up for Aging Parents</image:title>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Showing Up for Aging Parents - My grandma Connie’s crockpot, simmering pinto beans.</image:title>
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    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/fielding-lifes-curveballs-how-playing-sports-shapes-my-parenting</loc>
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    <lastmod>2025-03-18</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Fielding Life’s Curveballs: How Playing Sports Shapes My Parenting - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Once a tomboy, always a tomboy.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/ae6b8e76-4a80-41d9-ad84-394be2ce49ba/IMG_8821.JPG</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Fielding Life’s Curveballs: How Playing Sports Shapes My Parenting - My dad, a kind and compassionate social worker by day, was my coach. Back then, I thought he coached my teams simply to spend time with me and because we both loved the game. Now, I realize that he had a bigger purpose - he wanted to impart his worldview and instill his values in me. During one game, a line drive smashed into my face, and my eyes filled with tears. My dad walked me away from the diamond, held my hand, and created space for me to cry. After he comforted me, he told me to shake it off, keep playing and show everyone - kids and parents included - how tough I was. Play with heart. Never Quit.</image:title>
      <image:caption>Girl jock, Tricia, age 10. Opposing parents critiqued my "girly" pants</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Fielding Life’s Curveballs: How Playing Sports Shapes My Parenting - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Strong Women. Know Them. Raise Them. Be Them.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/ambiguous-grief</loc>
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    <lastmod>2025-03-06</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - When will my mama forget me? Becoming fluent in the language of grief - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Bling from John Onwuchekwa’s “We Go On” Tour</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - When will my mama forget me? Becoming fluent in the language of grief - Morning coffee with my mama</image:title>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - When will my mama forget me? Becoming fluent in the language of grief</image:title>
      <image:caption>one of my bracelet choices: grieving a dream</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/buildcommunitysmashthepatriarchy</loc>
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    <lastmod>2024-09-26</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Make Stuff, Build Community &amp;amp; Smash the Patriarchy - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Make Stuff, Build Community &amp;amp; Smash the Patriarchy - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Make Stuff, Build Community &amp;amp; Smash the Patriarchy - The wedding was Hawaiian &amp; (LGBTQ+ Pride) rainbow themed.</image:title>
      <image:caption>We chose colors of the rainbow and were given free (purple) rein to design three tables as we saw fit; I was on "Team Purple".</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Make Stuff, Build Community &amp;amp; Smash the Patriarchy - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/teens-have-stories-to-tell-are-adults-willing-to-listen-58rsl-cdjg7</loc>
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    <lastmod>2024-07-30</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Mantras Swirling in My Mind - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/b3450dc8-6bbc-4e0d-90bd-30720b54bf6e/LIfe+is+pain.jpeg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Mantras Swirling in My Mind</image:title>
      <image:caption>Art by Megan Devine</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Mantras Swirling in My Mind - C</image:title>
      <image:caption>Cosplaying as Coach Beard from Ted Lasso</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/teens-have-stories-to-tell-are-adults-willing-to-listen</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2024-07-30</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/a0717b13-37bd-43dc-a55e-8c3f89ac36b6/Teens+black+white.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Teens Have Stories to Tell: Are Adults Willing to Listen? - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/882e4b19-680e-4004-8820-6934acc5e5ad/Andrik+writing.jpeg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Teens Have Stories to Tell: Are Adults Willing to Listen? - In our classroom, I notice smart, sensitive kids desperate to express themselves. They are eager to be seen and heard after too many years of isolation and disconnection caused by pandemic schooling.</image:title>
      <image:caption>My 16-year old son is the same age as the students we teach; he's in a parallel developmental stage and holds similar world views, in many ways. The difference is that while my own child is guarded with me, our students grant me access to their inner lives through their creative work. They share their ideas and emotions openly and honestly. When I pay attention, our students teach me to be a more compassionate educator and a better mother to my own children.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/43515ef1-b1c8-4abc-b821-b9ff2e90fe3e/Parents+Joy.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Teens Have Stories to Tell: Are Adults Willing to Listen?</image:title>
      <image:caption>In a poem about her relationship with her parents, one student writes: I am my parent’s greatest joy a joy so big eating me alive</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/d2b948e6-3a2f-4ce5-a71d-dba00b0bc39a/word+callage.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Teens Have Stories to Tell: Are Adults Willing to Listen?</image:title>
      <image:caption>Our students produce audio stories about “10 Things that Scare Me”, based on a WYNC Public Radio podcast of the same name. They approach this challenging project with seriousness and a willingness to be vulnerable in front of their peers. During a recent editing session, a student was focused, intense, his fingers flying over the keyboard as he searched for the right music to layer into his “10 Things that Scare Me” sound track.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Teens Have Stories to Tell: Are Adults Willing to Listen? - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/sandwichgeneration</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
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    <lastmod>2024-07-30</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Mothering &amp;amp; the Sandwich Generation - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/a57df894-4ca7-4af3-9a06-d11f90dfaf56/Newsletter+Quote.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Mothering &amp;amp; the Sandwich Generation</image:title>
      <image:caption>I’ve been grieving the gradual loss of my mother during a time when I’ve needed mothering the most. “Is this my mom?”  She offers to give me a head rub while I lie on the couch reading, light spilling through the windows of her beautiful home, bathing me in warmth. I have been desperately trying to practice radical acceptance, to acknowledge my grief, to accept this new inversion of our mother &amp; daughter relationship. I thought the days of her comforting me were over. Tears well up in my eyes as I melt into her touch. The head rub heals me, breaks me wide open, repairs my broken heart, just a little.  This is my mom</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Mothering &amp;amp; the Sandwich Generation - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/radical-acceptance</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2024-07-30</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - I Gotta #KeepLiving</image:title>
      <image:caption>I used to be an optimist. I believed, in my bones, Bob Marley's view that "every little thing gonna be alright". I thought that if I loved my people hard enough and never gave up, things would generally work out. Then the pandemic hit.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - I Gotta #KeepLiving - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/4215e92d-1bfb-42d9-8612-271f4bc38e3a/IMG_0016.JPG</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - I Gotta #KeepLiving - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/19dfec28-6072-440d-91fd-c37e605091a5/dad+text+messages.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - I Gotta #KeepLiving</image:title>
      <image:caption>A wise fellow parent reminded me that Radical Acceptance doesn’t mean giving up; it means creating space for us to continue to live our lives in the face of our pain, grief and loss. It frees me up to begin to explore Options B, C and D when Option A is no longer a path available to me or my family. Over the last few years, my father and I have developed a shorthand message we text each other during moments of despair or, alternately, when we recognize sparks of joy that give us life: #keepliving. I don’t know what makes makes me smile harder - my 80-year old dad using a hashtag correctly or the message embodied within the hashtag itself? Either way, I appreciate the regular reminders to try to practice Radical Acceptance. I gotta #keepliving.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/being-a-girl-jock-saved-my-soul</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2024-07-30</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Being a Girl Jock Saved My Soul</image:title>
      <image:caption>Doc U Mental high fives the crowd after a hard fought roller derby bout. Photo by Michael Shick.</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/51f9a099-a56a-493b-985b-9917bde487d2/IMG_8821.JPG</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Being a Girl Jock Saved My Soul - I’ve played a range of team sports my whole life - softball, basketball, roller derby - because that combination of feminism, friendship, physicality and team work is the perfect blend that inspires me to show up as my authentic and enthusiastic self. I am competitive, by nature, but I direct most of that drive toward judging myself harshly; I am my own worst critic, a thousand times over. Playing with friends reminds me to prioritize fun and relationships, to stay loose, open-hearted and not judge my own performance as an athlete above all else. When I started roller derby at the age of 44, I was among the oldest players on my team. I figured, “This’ll be fun! I already know how to skate!” I had grown up disco roller skating; there had been a roller rink walking distance from our house when I was a kid. I could backwards skate smoothly. I was fast - I remember the thrill of speed and the cooling sensation of air on my face as I zoomed around the rink. Even as a young adult, I’d roller-skated to college multiple times a week, rolling through the streets from Oakland to U.C. Berkeley as part of my morning commute.</image:title>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/f424f5ce-2f69-40e3-9338-053f57a48e6a/Use+that+Booty.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Being a Girl Jock Saved My Soul - Learning to play derby was an act of humility. I had to intentionally release my ego, to ignore my perfectionistic drive to always be the best at everything I did.</image:title>
      <image:caption>Use that booty</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/teens-have-stories-to-tell-are-adults-willing-to-listen-58rsl</loc>
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    <lastmod>2024-07-30</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - The “Hot Mess Guarantee” - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/08ca897a-1979-43f4-a46f-13bad1f434f6/dishes-197_1280+2.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - The “Hot Mess Guarantee” - Kitt’s actions made it easier to ask for help when I needed it the next time. In my mind, we share an unspoken Hot Mess Guarantee. Nothing is too scary or or overwhelming that we can’t deal with it together. Just. Show. Up. No. Matter. What.</image:title>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - The “Hot Mess Guarantee”</image:title>
      <image:caption>Art by Megan Devine</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.tricia-speaks.com/writing/i-am-burnt-and-remade-womens-wellness-retreat-poetry</loc>
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    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2024-07-30</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - I am burnt and remade: Women’s Wellness Retreat Poetry - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>The Female Gaze: Camera as a tool for empathy</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/dfcc8c9d-65d6-49f6-8f17-1da41de684f3/hand+in+water.jpeg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - I am burnt and remade: Women’s Wellness Retreat Poetry - I am lost in the waters that heal me or drown me, gasping, fighting, succumbing</image:title>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - I am burnt and remade: Women’s Wellness Retreat Poetry - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2024-08-17</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Crafty Chicas: Creating Women’s Space in Today’s World - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>"Girls Knitting a Blanket", 1943. Courtesy of the Newark Public Library.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Crafty Chicas: Creating Women’s Space in Today’s World - The Household Magazine, October 1936.</image:title>
      <image:caption>We celebrate each other’s pieces. There is something deeply satisfying about making something - start to finish -and walking away with something you’ve handcrafted. How often do we get to reflect on and create beauty, even if it is a bit lopsided or unfinished or imperfect. I mean, aren’t we all? The overall vibe is one of gentle reassurance that whatever you make is fine. That you are doing JUST. FINE. In a recent #craftychicas vision board workshop, we answered the question: “Where and with whom did you feel the most safe and seen in 2023? A friend in the group answered Women’s Wellness Camp, a weekend retreat organized by YMCA of Silicon Valley in the Santa Cruz Mountains that we’ve cultivated over the years. What is is about camp that engenders safety, exploration and celebration of women? For sure, we craft (tie-dye, collage, clay, wood burning) - the stuff of old fashioned summer camp!) but we also dance and write and cry and share our fears and swap clothing and books and then we dance some more.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
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      <image:title>Tricia Speaks! Blog - Crafty Chicas: Creating Women’s Space in Today’s World - "The Witches Sabbath". Woodblock Print. Circa 1510. Metropolitan Museum of Art. There is often a pure connection, a sense of play and nurture, a yearning to learn together, to be better together when women gather in these ways. Is this a modern day version of witches’ covens or feminist communes? Sign me up, baby!</image:title>
      <image:caption>And so it goes with my community of #craftychicas: we commiserate and we craft. Our imperfect (though sometimes gloriously beautiful and artistic) creations reflect our layered, complex lives and celebrate the space we’ve created to nurture our friendships.</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2026-01-12</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/9ba6ce69-2df5-4a5a-aabf-fa2fd658462c/TCV+and+Paul.jpg</image:loc>
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      <image:caption>Born and raised in Southern California. Totally awesome.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/6bb987ba-5bc8-45f2-91fe-e0a49d9926bc/TCV+Tomboy+2.jpg</image:loc>
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      <image:caption>Tomboy to my core</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/1721692862720-TAOTW7EW19HPK4Q6HBEO/basketball.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Bio</image:title>
      <image:caption>Girl Jock 4evah: softball, basketball, track and... cheerleading (!). in high school. My first experimental film was about cheerleaders of color who became activists.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/1721350911604-993PKX8WX9NKGD0201WZ/TCV%2BGraduation.jpg</image:loc>
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      <image:caption>First girl in my family to graduate from college. Pictured here with my flawless Grandma Connie. Go Bears!</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:caption>I got better at filmmaking over time but my impeccable fashion sense remains timeless.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/1721324301917-GDZPX2CWC3VC974LYUUD/FILMMAKING_TCV+Dionicia+in+Mexico+with+camera.jpg</image:loc>
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      <image:caption>Filming in Tijuana, Mexico with Dionicia, the star of "Stable Life". #chingonas</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:caption>My post-production team - Meadow and Ramiro (behind-the-scenes-geniuses) stepped out on the red carpet with me the night we won "Best Documentary" at the Cinequest Film Festival.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:caption>The Northern CA Emmy Awards! I sang Beck's "I'm a loser, baby" on the drive home. It's an honor to have been nominated...</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/9c391690-5035-4c72-81c3-560675570091/TCV+Derby.jpg</image:loc>
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      <image:caption>My roller derby name was Doc U Mental (Spanish for documentary film).</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:caption>Cosplaying "Coach Beard" from Ted Lasso. The show was a welcome relief during the pandemic and I embraced the mantra "BELIEVE".</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6670ed43933ae90074c7ac55/1721423796942-BU2494YYMO71DV3BCSMY/TCV%2BPodcasting_headphones_PowerHouse.jpg</image:loc>
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      <image:caption>Founder of PowerHouse. My superpower is helping other people claim their power.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:caption>I'm a daughter and a mama. Sandwich generation 100%</image:caption>
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